Let’s be real relationships are tough enough as it is. But when you’re dealing with someone who’s showing narcissistic traits, things can get really tricky, draining, and even harmful to your emotional well-being. As a registered clinical counsellor in Port Coquitlam and Surrey, I work with individuals and couples to figure out how to navigate those complicated patterns, especially when narcissistic behavior is in the mix.
What Are Narcissistic Traits?
So, what exactly do I mean by narcissistic traits? Well, it’s when someone shows signs like an inflated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy, and a tendency to manipulate. If you’ve ever been in a relationship with someone like this, you know how challenging it can be. Let’s break down 10 common narcissistic traits that might sound familiar:
10 Narcissistic Traits:
- Excessive Need for Admiration:
Ever feel like your partner needs constant praise? Like you’re always boosting their ego? That’s a pretty big sign of narcissism. - Sense of Entitlement:
They might expect special treatment all the time, without really giving anything in return. It’s like they think they deserve the world and you’re just supposed to cater to their every need. - Lack of Empathy:
One of the most frustrating traits is that they just don’t seem to care about your feelings. You might open up about something important, and they’ll brush it off like it’s nothing. - Manipulation and Control:
They’ll often twist things to keep control. You might have experienced gaslighting, where they make you doubt your own reality, or they might guilt-trip you to get what they want. - Superiority Complex:
These folks can come off as arrogant, acting like they’re better than everyone around them. In relationships, this often looks like belittling their partner just to feel more powerful. - Fragile Self-Esteem (Masked by Confidence):
They might seem super confident, but underneath it all, their self-esteem is actually pretty fragile. A little criticism can send them spiraling into anger or withdrawal. - Fear of Criticism:
Speaking of criticism, they can’t handle it at all. Even the tiniest bit of feedback feels like a personal attack, and they’ll often lash out or try to make it your fault. - Exploitative Behavior:
They tend to take advantage of others—especially their partners—without thinking twice about the impact. It’s all about what they can get out of the relationship. - Jealousy and Possessiveness:
Narcissists often feel like they own their partner, leading to a lot of controlling behavior. They might get jealous when you spend time with friends or do things independently. - Lack of Accountability:
When things go wrong, don’t expect them to own up to it. Narcissists are quick to blame others for their mistakes, making it hard to have productive conversations.
Even if someone doesn’t have full-blown narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), these traits can still show up and really mess with a relationship.
How Narcissism Affects Relationships
If you’ve been in a relationship with someone who has narcissistic traits, you’ve probably felt like the relationship is all about them. Here’s what often happens:
- They’ll control the narrative, so you always feel like you’re in the wrong or like your feelings don’t matter.
- They’ll use manipulation tactics like gaslighting to make you question your own thoughts and emotions.
- They have a hard time accepting any responsibility, so if something goes wrong, it’s definitely not their fault (at least in their mind).
- They crave power and control, leaving you feeling isolated, confused, and constantly on edge.
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. These behaviors can leave you feeling exhausted, insecure, and like you’re walking on eggshells.
How to Manage Your Relationship with a Narcissistic Partner:
- Setting Boundaries: It’s crucial to protect yourself emotionally. Together, we’ll work on establishing clear boundaries so you can stand your ground and regain control of your personal space in the relationship.
- Recognizing Manipulation: Narcissistic partners often use tactics like gaslighting to distort reality. I’ll help you spot these manipulative behaviors and empower you to break free from their control.
- Healing from Emotional Damage: Recovering from the emotional wounds caused by a narcissistic relationship takes time, but you don’t have to do it alone. We’ll focus on processing the pain and rediscovering your inner strength.
- Improving Communication: Whether you choose to stay or move on, we’ll explore effective ways to communicate, advocate for your needs, and decide what’s best for your emotional well-being.
If you’re in a relationship with someone who has narcissistic traits, or even if you just want to improve your overall relationship health, getting mental health support is a game-changer.
Ready to Take the Next Step?
Being in a relationship with someone who has narcissistic tendencies can be overwhelming, but you don’t have to go through it alone. At Sartipi Counselling, I’m here to offer the support and guidance you need to get back in control of your life and relationships.
As a registered clinical counsellor in British Columbia, I’m ready to help you start healing. Whether you’re looking for individual counselling or couples therapy, I’m here to help you find healthier relationship patterns and take care of your emotional well-being.
Let’s chat! Contact me today and let’s see how counselling can make a difference in your relationship.
